Temperature

As the temperature in Finland is falling it’s time to talk about

The Finnish Thermometer

+ 15º C: This is as warm as it gets in Finland, so we’ll start here. People in Spain wear winter-coats   and gloves. The Finns are out in the sun, getting a tan.

+ 10º C: The French are trying in vain to start their central heating. The Finns plant flowers in their gardens.

+ 5 º C: Italian cars won’t start. The Finns are cruising in cabriolets.

   0 º C: Distilled water freezes. The water in the Vanda river in southern Finland gets a little thicker.

-5 º C: People in California almost freeze to death. The Finns have their final barbecue before winter.

-10º C: The Brits start the heat in their houses. The Finns start using long sleeves.

-20º C: The Aussies flee from Mallorca. The Finns end their midsummer celebrations. Autumn is here.

-30º C: People in Greece die from the cold and disappear from the face of the Earth. The Finns start drying their laundry indoors.

-40º C: Paris starts cracking in the cold. The Finns stand in line at the hot dog stands.

-50º C: Polar bears start evacuating the North Pole. The Finnish army postpones their winter survival training awaiting real winter weather.

-60º C: Korvatunturi – the home for Santa Claus – freezes. The Finns rent a movie and stay indoors.

-70º C: The false Santas from Sweden and Norway move south.

              The Finns get frustrated since they can’t store their Koskenkorva vodka outdoors.

              The Finnish army goes out on winter survival training.

-183º C: Microbes in food don’t survive. The Finnish cows complain that the farmers’ hands are cold.

-273º C: All atom-based movement halts. The Finns start saying:”******, it’s cold outside.”

-300º C: Hell freezes over. Finland wins the next Eurovision Song contest.

Let’s hope we all survive another winter and use it by learning more English!